Lord CLOSE the eyes of my heart…

My cousin – somehow, twice removed or three times forward, at any rate we are cousins, shared my blog post from Sunday. She added the caption, “Open the eyes of my heart Lord…”  And this seemed good and reasonable.


Yes, Lord, do that.  Open the eyes of my heart.

Lots of feedback from that post, good and bad.  On the bad side, there were criticisms about the holes in my argument.  One million moms weren’t attacking adoption and foster care.  And no, they weren’t.  They were saying that they didn’t want their children to have to see the demise of the conservative view of the family while they shopped.

And my argument was I was sorry that they were “uncomfortable” in the lap of luxury.  Let’s stop whining and let’s get busy!


This is neither here nor there.  Because I prayed alongside my cousin, Kaysee, “Open the eyes of my heart Lord.”  She in one small Texas town, I in another.

The Lord opened the eyes of my heart. And this is what I saw:

I ran to Dollar General to grab some trash bags.  I was standing in line behind a well-dressed man, maybe 40-ish, buying cigarettes.  He was obviously old enough to buy cigarettes, but the young cashier said, “May I see your I.D?”

He lost his mind.

You wonder if you will run out of blog material, and then you get to witness this kind of utter madness.  He proceeds to rant and rave, what best I can tell, is a speech he has given before about the dictatorships of the American government interfering with his rights to smoke.  The poor girl behind the counter is looking at him with the blankest of stares.  I have a way with words, so I am able to interpret the look, and it reads like this:
“You are a moron.  I make $7.25 an hour and didn’t finish the 8th grade. I have met raw chicken meat with more intelligence than you.  I hate you.  I hate everything you stand for.  I want a different life.  I hope you get hit by a bus.  I hope I am on the bus, in the front row so that I can witness your demise.”

stupid dog

Are you familiar with this look?

The look doesn’t deter.  He continues, turning to me, with a disgruntled chuckle, as if we are on the same page of what he has deemed asinine and his last straw.  I am not with him at all.  I try to convey this by checking my phone and rolling my eyes.  To which he says, “OH! I see how it is?  Why don’t you give out your date of birth to anyone who asks.” And I snark, “September 26, 1971.” And he YELLS, “You are part of the problem!”


And he is right. I am.

I wrote a barking blog post and fully participated in the madness of what I believe American Christians are doing wrong, thereby, doing it wrong.  I have tried all morning to justify this for the Tuesday post.  My eyes are wide open, and I can’t get them shut.  I even prayed, “Close the eyes of my heart Lord.” And He said no.

close eyes

So, I got one of those Facebook flashback alerts. I can’t shake off the image.  It is of a Starbucks cup.  One year ago today my daughter Maggie posted the picture below.  With the caption: “I am turning into my mom, lipstick on my Starbucks cup.”


The barking lunatics are fighting a battle. A battle for their beliefs. I tried to convince God to let me blog on the insanity of wanting not to have to look at a homosexual couple while they shop, or the warm fuzzy feeling they get when there is a Christmas tree on their $6.00 latte.  I even pleaded, “LORD!  I will title it: I’ll have a non-fat, full-fat, extra whip, double shot, caramel, soy, extra hot, Venti, vanilla latte, in a cup with a reindeer on it, please!” He said no. I saw another post that said: “Pray to Stop Starbucks!” and I pleaded, “LORD PLEASE!!!! Let me just…” and He said NO.

Because that is the barking dog.  Americanized Jesus.  Our tender spirits offended.  And although I think He thought the title was kind of funny, He wants more for us.  We have everything.  And we are fighting for and falling for utter ridiculous things.  And we bark.  Jesus was this, Jesus was that! Jesus would drink lattes with the homosexuals! Jesus would not!  Nuh-uh!  Uh-huh! Jesus wouldn’t pay that much for a latte! You’re not the boss of me! Yes, I am!

more barking

And my eyes spy Satan sitting back sipping a Grande Mocha-Frap, cause it’s more refreshing when you’re in hell, and letting us do the battle for him.  The barking dogs are their own undoing. Then I saw this…

FullSizeRender (5)

This.  This should make us so desperately sad.  For Christians to become the mockery. For the rise up, to be at our ridiculousness.  The look from the cashier – that we would be looked at like this?  This is sad.

And then, my eyes were further opened.  The picture below is my laundry room now.


A fellow adoptive/foster mom made arrangements to leave clothes for our two young sons.  Her boys outgrew them, and she thought of us.  She took time out of her day, packed up these items and hauled them here.  Coats, shoes, pants, shirts – two huge bags.  My husband who, by the way, was not a fan of Sunday’s post, said, “Oh! Where did all those clothes come from?” and I explained and he said, “That is what I am talking about. Just general kind, helpful, behavior.  Just kind.”

No barking.

No hatefulness.

No arguments.

Just kind.

Just Jesus.

Gentle Jesus, who simply said, “Follow me…”

I want to be more like that.  Kindly leaving clean folded Spider-Man pajamas on your doorstep, with a piping hot cup of Starbucks. I know I will still be snarky, and I know I will rant and rave again, but I refuse to be used by the enemy to make anyone look at me with “that” look.  The eyes of my heart are open.

girl and dog

May your floors be sticky and your calling ordained. Love, Jami

“As Jesus went on from there, He saw a man called Matthew, sitting in the tax collector’s booth; and He said to Him “Follow Me!” And Matthew got up and followed Him.” Matthew 9:9

About jamiamerine

I am a wife, mom, & seeker of joy! I love to share funny and inspirational tales with my fellow moms. I fully believe that God intended laughter to be a form of rest and worship. I have a few kids. I have a few years on me. I have a great husband. And I love to laugh. I studied home economics in college, I can cook just about anything, but do not ask me to sew. In my graduate work I studied education and human development, I consider my life continuing education, my children are my ongoing thesis. If they survive that, I will let you know! I write non-fiction for laughter, respite, and inspiration. I also am in the process of submitting my first fiction mystery and have two more in the works! Mom life is hard work. My prayer for my readers is that, even if it you just have five minutes, you can be inspired and encouraged today. Keep it short and sweet... rest in Jesus girlfriend.
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26 Responses to Lord CLOSE the eyes of my heart…

  1. Kim says:

    Thanks Jami! I love so many of your posts…for they make us think and reflect. I believe we have two emotions that drive all our behaviors…FEAR and LOVE. I also believe Jesus would always want us to act out of LOVE, not fear.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. It’s hard to be a follower of Christ in the land of the offended. So, I will continue to read my bible, sip my Starbucks and hope the choices I make in this life will cause others to look to Christ. It wont be easy and I will screw it up, but God knows my heart. And for that, I am thankful! Glad to have stopped by today. Love your website name! So relatable.

    Liked by 1 person

  3. kristine says:

    Oh Jami, this should be the cry of our hearts every day of the year! When did we start letting the bitterness and bickering get in the way? It breaks my heart to see these things, but it also brings me straight back to the source of my joy and peace. It reminds me that I am nothing without Him, and I can freely share that joy and peace with someone else today. Thank you for these powerful words. Blessings!

    Liked by 1 person

  4. Colleen B says:

    Excellent post. This Starbucks thing bewilders me. I wondered if I was missing something huge or essential but I am not. They really are just protesting red cups. I don’t understand…:)

    Liked by 1 person

    • jamiamerine says:

      Me either but it’s working. If it’s Starbucks they are driving up sales. If it’s the Christians they are alienating believers and vice versa… But I stand my belief that the enemy keeps Americans busy with non-sense and we are falling for if. I love your blog name. 🌹

      Liked by 1 person

  5. mckelvie12 says:

    I’m with you. Not giving up on Starbucks either.

    Liked by 1 person

  6. Sometimes I wish He would “close the eyes of my heart” as well. I need more gentleness but finding the balance between that and being real when I need to is hard. Like when I send out my child’s birthday invite with a request for NO GIFTS. I want to stick to my convictions about teaching my children to have less stuff and being content. Idolism runs rampant and I just want different for them. But these types of requests from me are never accepted well and step on some toes for some reason. Sometimes it’s hard because I hate upsetting and offending and I hate having to find the balance is gentleness and honesty with my responses to these critics. (I did get a little snarky with one mom’s response to me.) It’s just tough. …. I hope I did not miss the point of your post.


  7. Kathy says:

    Keep on preaching, Jamie. You are right. I don’t understand what makes some people think the things they do.

    I don’t get the Starbucks thing either BUT I did see people actually gripping about the cups on the news last week. THEY ARE CUPS. My family has been using red cups at Christmas for decades. PUL-EEZE, people, get a grip.

    This guy has a point, by the way. http://www.patheos.com/blogs/mercynotsacrifice/2015/11/09/starbucks-brilliant-exploitation-of-the-war-against-the-war-against-christmas/

    Liked by 1 person

  8. Lisa says:


    Liked by 1 person

  9. Erica says:

    This is good. The part with the judgmental assumption that the cashier “didn’t finish the 8th grade” kind of made my jaw drop but otherwise, glad to see that you’ve had this revelation. I so wanted to make a comment on the American Girl post but didn’t want to go all negative on it, but this is what I was thinking. It’s also why I kept my mouth shut. Since I’m new here, and it was one of the first posts I read, I almost unsubscribed, but something made me wait. Obviously as Christians, we have to be very choosy as to what we put out there, but messages of hate OR not standing up for what the Bible says are equally detrimental in my mind. Constant complaining and bickering is not spreading the love of Jesus Christ. Jesus was more harsh on proclaimed Christians than he was on the unbelieving. He expects more from us, we are his hands and his feet. These are also the things we are warned about, we can’t go along with the world. We have to keep our beliefs no matter what is hurdled at us or forced down our throats. Finding the balance of doing that with peace and love is tough. Sometimes our hearts are in the right place but our emotions are not and that is where we get off track.

    Liked by 1 person

  10. Kimberly says:

    So, there is such a thing as righteous anger (think flipping tables in the temple and cracking whips), but I think that’s best left to Jesus. That doesn’t mean we can’t get angry when we see a true injustice (of which there are many, many, many) but we really need to check it before we spew it. I think that Christians are following the masses – EVERYONE is offended by something nowadays. Just.stop. We have so much to be grateful for in our lives – and being able to afford Starbucks or American Girl qualifies as something to be grateful for, even if you choose not to support them.

    Liked by 1 person

  11. Ren says:

    I think you’re right to call out what needs to be called out, BUT I think it’s right to take stands too.
    Where I have to disagree with you: “the demise of the conservative view of the family” It isn’t the demise of the conservative view, it *IS* the demise of God’s design for the family- you understand that, right?
    It is silly to boycott everything that promotes LGBT. . . we’d have to go build a house in the woods and live off the land to be effective in that war because almost every group/company is jumping on board that band wagon. However, we’re to know what unrighteousness is- so you are wholely wrong in saying it’s “the conservative view” that is being challenged.
    God, from every angle, is being challenged and rejected by our culture, and it isn’t a sign of over privilaged American Christianity to see unrighteousness spreading and care about our culture embracing sin, because as Proverbs 14:34 says- it’s a “reproach to any people”, and because the days are, in fact, evil (and not just the scewed view of over privilaged conservative Americans), it’s not wrong to see it and speak out against it (Ephesians 5:10-15).
    I wrote out more, but thought it was really good, and decided that it should be a blog post, which spares you from having to read a rediculously long rant. . . You’re welcome 😉


  12. I love this. One of my favorite songs is “Open The Eyes of My Heart Lord” but in truth, I may be too cowardice to see the truth!

    Liked by 1 person

  13. Kim says:

    What the Bible says about homosexuality
    6 – number of Bible references teaching homosexuality is wrong.
    6 – number of Bible references teaching that Galileo’s astronomy is wrong.
    20 – minimum number of Bible references supporting polygamy.
    60 – minimum number of Bible references supporting slavery.
    140 – minimum number of Bible references supporting the subordination of women.
    2000 – fewest possible Bible references teaching that God desires mercy, not judgment; forgiveness, not self-righteousness; and grace, wastefully and freely given, especially to the most vulnerable among us.

    Liked by 1 person

  14. Honour says:

    “Gentle Jesus, who simply said, “Follow me…””
    Gentleness is harder than we think. Arguing and being offended is a lot easier.

    Liked by 1 person

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